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🟩 In the Hills, the Cities (1984) Review - Human Kaiju Battle Royale | Book Waffle

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In the Hills, the Cities (1984) written by Clive Barker "Want to fuck?" What an amazing line. I first read this story in 2018. At the time, I remember thinking it was just OK. And yet, something about this short story continues to eat away at me nearly a decade on.  There's something distinct here. Something so strange. So disturbing. So disgusting. I can't put my finger on it. In the Hills, the Cities  follows Mick and Judd, two gay English boy toys traveling around the Yugoslav countryside. As they wind through dirt roads, past farms and cottages, they come across a startling discovery. A battlefield. Not of armies, but of colossuses. Two giants made of thousands of humans. Men, women, and children strapped and harnessed together in a feat of grotesque engineering. Stephen King famously categorizes horror into three buckets.  Terror. The psychological. Horror. The shocking. Gross-out. The repulsive. On the surface, In the Hills, the Cities  falls distinctly into ...
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🟥 Spiral (2019) Review - Father Cringe Comes to Preach | Film Waffle

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   Spiral  (2019) directed by Kurtis David Harder I had reserved this slot for Leviticus by Adrian Chiarella, but that plan fell through. Also I got sick so this is a month late. Whoops.  Today we are taking a look at a 2019 Canadian horror thriller  named Spiral that  I pulled straight from  Wikipedia's hairy behind . And, oh boy,  I got bad vibes in the first five minutes.  "This is one of them insufferably pinky-out films for Disney Adults, isn't it?" Mhmm. Yes. Let's continually spout platitudes about how society is scared of differences.  But don't be afraid to be yourself! The bravest thing you can do is live out and proud! All that same, tired old shit that your lefty aunt shares on Facebook before stumbling into yet another flamewar with your righty grandpappy. Lord have mercy.  I think I gotta take the old man's side on this one, Auntie.  This movie f eels very much like a product of the mid-to-late 2010s. Like it...
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🟩 Giovanni's Room (1956) Review - Deadbeat Denied | Book Waffle

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Giovanni's Room (1956) written by James Baldwin For some time now, I've told my friends that I don't want book or movie recommendations that deal with identity. Everyone is so goddamn obsessed with "telling their story" and pouring their heart out in the most tedious, cookie-cutter fashion that it, ironically, becomes cliche. We've been treading the same ground with different coats of paint for the last decade now. Preachy. Preachy. Preachy. "Sounds like you've got a chip on your shoulder, Colin." Yeah? Well maybe I do.  There's been something of a perverse trend lately. One where people are compelled to praise media for exploring themes, even if the characters and story are shoddy. And people wonder why no one trusts critic scores. /RantOver Maybe such stories just weren't for me. That's okay, right? I mean, look at the gay media I've reviewed the past month. Most of them were middling. Some were awful. But I had one more chanc...
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🟨 Rift (2017) Review - Answers Found Dead in a Ditch | Film Waffle

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Rift  (2017) directed by Erlingur Thoroddsen Hah! You thought I was dead and buried after not publishing for a few weeks, didn't you? Well, not so fast buckaroo. I'm here! And I'm...! Well. You know the rest. Let's hit it. I have very mixed feelings about Euro cinema. On the one hand, I appreciate the experimental nature. Europeans are much more likely to be ambiguous and subtle. To play with the surreal and mess with your mind.             Probably has something to do with them not getting that Hollywood money; instead, they often get support from government culture departments. It's a practice that cultivates a unique atmosphere of creativity. One m ore artsy and less flashy compared to American cinema.  However, the line between avant-garde and artsy fartsy is notoriously slim. And, while some European media walk this tightrope well, the vast majority do not. Take today's movie from jolly ol' Iceland, Rift .  Or, as I've taken to call...
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🟥 P.S. I Spook You (2017) Review - Hackneyed Harlequin | Book Waffle

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P.S. I Spook You  (2017) written by S.E. Harmon It's strange that 90% of M/M romance isn't targeted at gay men like me. That's kinda bizarre, right? Not hating on it. Just something I've always found to be weird. We follow some chap named Rain Christiansen. The dude is a do-gooding FBI detective who sees ghosts. Naturally, he gets chewed out by his boss one day for creeping on some grieving family and telling them that their daughter is in a better place.  As punishment, his boss tells him to GTFO and solve a cold case somewhere in the country. And, for some reason known only to God, the man chooses a case from his hometown.  You know. The town where his annoying family and hunky police detective ex live. Amazing decision. A true glutton for punishment. I could tell this wasn't written by a man in the first few pages. The first paragraphs, in fact.  The book begins with multiple long-winded descriptions of characters' appearances.  Massive red flag.  "Oh b...
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🟨 Hypochondriac (2022) Review - Ghost of Fursona Past | Film Waffle

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Hypochondriac  (2022) directed by Addison Heimann Gay men and daddy issues. Name a more iconic duo.  Uniquely,  Hypochondriac brings home the mommy issues for the main course.  Truly breaking the mold. We love equality in this house. Quick Summary It's been 18 years since Will's mommy dearest attempted to choke him to death during one of her psychotic episodes, yet the dude's  Oedipus complex is still firing on all cylinders. Now a fully-fledged adult and gay twink living on the Golden Coast, Will works as a potter. He's got a nice life. A nice boyfriend who lives in a suspiciously spacious and lavish house given the cost-of-living crisis. A nice friend who lets the dude and his bf stay in her family's sick mountain lodge for free. But the past still haunts our protaga-twink. When his mother begins reaching out after her stint in a mental hospital, the painful memories of his childhood begin to resurface. Story & Characters There's a surprising amount of th...
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